Post-Wedding To Do List

1.) Go On Honeymoon
2.) Change Phone Number

While Meg was researching all of the support players in our wedding (photographer, videographer, some-other-ographer), she was pretty thorough. That was very effective in getting us good deals on these already overpriced services (although why we have to feed these damn people is beyond me).

However, in the process, our phone number has managed to be circulated to every wedding related service in a 25 mile radius. Let me tell you, these people are persistent. Despite our sincerest efforts to convince these people that their services are not required, they insist on following up with weekly phone calls to ensure that we still don’t need them. Before signing up for caller ID so we can avoid them entirely, my responses grew considerably more intense:

“We already have a photographer.”
“We already got married.”
“The wedding is canceled.”
“I became a priest.”
“She left me to move to [insert South American country here]”
“The bride was eaten by Godzilla.”

Each response was met with “Thank you anyway. In the future, please consider our company for your [insert service here] needs.” Only to be followed up the next week with “We just wanted to make sure you didn’t cancel your other photographer and decided to look for a new one.”

So a word of warning to the newly or soon-to-be engaged. When talking to these people, give false information to many of them. Make a yahoo/hotmail/gmail address specifically for the spam these people will send you, so once you’re married you can just stop checking it. Give them your parents’ address, so when you get married and move out, they are stuck with the junk mail. Same with phone numbers. And if by some chance you figure out the magical incantation to get these people to stop calling, please, by all means, let me know.

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