Invitations: Epilogue

I have to admit something. I am extremely disappointed with Meg. We are now a mere two months away from the wedding, and you have no idea how crazy and ridiculous she’s been lately.

That is, she hasn’t been crazy at all.

I would have thought that by now, Meg would be such an excited panic that she would produce blogging gold for me on a daily basis. Instead, she barely mentions the wedding, and we have been able to carry on conversations like normal human beings. This comes at a great time, as it reminds me just why we’re getting married in the first place.

That having been said, there are a number of clean up items about the invitations that should be addressed.

First off, everyone who called/e-mailed/IMed/sent carrier pigeons to me about how great the envelopes looked can kiss my ass. I know the only reason you noticed the envelopes was because of the stink I made. I further know that you don’t give a damn about the calligraphy, and in many cases did not even actually look at it. But I do also know which of you like giving me a hard time about anything possible (and if you’ve been reading this site for longer than a week, you’ll realize that just about everyone I know falls into that category), and I have no doubt in my head that you are just using the calligraphy as a means of pushing my buttons.

Bonus points go to Meg’s Aunt Pat, who, hosting Easter dinner today, had her invitation prominently featured on her refrigerator (alongside the STD, which should have been rendered useless at the receipt of an invitation, but she gets points for that too). Granted, the envelope wasn’t there, but she still gets credit for at least trying to make the invitation function as more than a simple sheet of paper.

In fact, I’ll buy the first round for anyone who e-mails me a picture of their invitation posted somewhere in their house. The more creative, the better.

Lastly, I’d like to point out one of the greatest ironies I have ever encountered outside of a movie script. As many will know, the calligraphy on the envelopes was nothing short of a debacle. In the end, I still don’t know why the outer envelope had to be calligraphied, but even I’ll concede that they looked very elegant.

Too elegant, in fact, for a few mailmen (no offense to mailmen reading the site, but you guys dropped the ball here). A number of invitations, with entirely valid addresses, were returned to sender. Perhaps the mailmen were enamored by their beauty and forgot to deliver them. Perhaps they wanted to show us the horrors these poor envelopes had to endure during their travels. Or, perhaps the envelopes were so overdone with calligraphy and elegance that they didn’t notice that the zip code was written, very elongated, under the city and state. For whatever reason, something about the calligraphy– [ahem] that Meg had to have– threw off the post office to the point that people who should have been able to bask in the glory of the invitation did not even receive one.

I’d be lying if I said that I didn’t laugh to myself when I found this out.


  1. Does “posted” in the pile of other event invitations count? They’re arranged by date if that makes it any better… Wait, that sounds too organized to be creative… Jon’ll get back to you I’m sure…

  2. I’m sure I’ve got a winner for the first round, but it keeps getting sent back. Me thinks there is a fix in the works!!!

    The following addresses had delivery problems:
    Persistent Transient Failure: Delivery time expired
    Delivery last attempted at 29 Mar 2005 17:25:15 +0000

  3. Damn, I’m having some problems with my mail server, so I temporarily changed the contact link to use a gmail address (

    Nancy, give that one a shot, I’m dying to see what you are trying to send me.

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