“How y’all doin’ today?”
I can’t properly spell the sound of disgust I make when people refer to me as “y’all”. I think it would most closely resemble “blech”, but is a bit more throaty.
After spending the weekend finishing up the home office project (blog on that coming later, but as a teaser: blood was shed), Monday morning I found myself at 8am not sitting comfortably at home, enjoying the fruits of my labor, but rather beginning a rather arduous journey to Dallas for work. I won’t launch into another rant about airlines, however I will mention that we were informed they overbooked the plane by 40 people. That’s forty, for anyone who thinks I may have made a typo. Having been in this situation before, I defended my ticket throughout all of the delays and managed to successfully arrive in Texas.
In summary, Texas sucks. While unsurprised, I’m still mildly annoyed at the fact that every radio station is country. Half of the streets are named after ways to cook and serve cattle. And my little piece of shit I rented is the only non-pickup truck on the road.
After spending two and a half hours four inches away from the reclined seat back of the pretentious blond in front of me, I figured I’d have a drink at dinner to calm my nerves. The waitress offered me a margarita when she took my drink order. Rather, she offered me and my three invisible companions margaritas, having referred to “y’all” when making the suggestion. Blech. I declined and opted for a beer instead.
Of course, that’d be too easy. I get carded, which as much as I hate to admit, is a compliment and helps to reassure me that I’m not that old. By comparison, I find I grow angry when I don’t get carded. I present my New Jersey license with an inconspicuous pride, trying to not attract the attention of the four red necks at a nearby table whose combined total number of teeth did not reach double digits. Never having seen a New Jersey license (by my estimation I doubt she’s seen a hair brush either), she takes it to look up.
At that time, I wondered if it would play out as it ultimately did. For you non-NJ readers, NJ moved to new licenses as of May 2004. I can be pretty sure of that accuracy, since my license was issued on April 27th, 2004, which was about a month before the new licenses entered circulation. I’m told I don’t have to have mine replaced, I can simply get a new one when this one expires in 2008. Hell, part of me enjoys the nostalgia of the old school laminated cardboard look.
While still a legal drivers license, the old school version has found its way out of the bar handbooks. As such, I might as well have handed this chick a sheet of paper that read “I is 21 years old.” Apparently, Texas is very strict on drinking. Apparently, I wasn’t getting my beer afterall.
The saving grace behind this trip to the land that time forgot is that I get to teach a training course. I ultimately see me moving on from development to teaching, so being able to break up my normal daily coding routine with training is a pretty sweet set up. Now I just have to learn the material I have to teach tomorrow and I’ll be set 😉